I think fondly of my mother. I don't see her often enough, and I feel guilty for it. We spent Christmas day with her, and she made a fabulous dinner that we enjoyed very much. After the dishes were cleared, we had more time to talk.
Day to day life leaves me harried, sometimes short-tempered or too succinct for good conversation at the end of the day. Some days work just wears me out. On these days, my occasional, brief conversations with her are punctuated with "uh-huh", "yeah" and "ok". Not a very good real conversation. But on this day, we easily went past that continued on to genuine discussion, rekindling some mutual interests and we made promises to "get together again soon". I intend to keep that promise, for I treasure my mother.
She was always my role model as a child/young woman/adult woman, and in so many ways. Beautiful, independent, vivacious, fun, intelligent...those are a few words I would select to describe her. She mostly raised me herself, at a time when society looked down upon divorcees, she worked hard and diligently in her medical career. I remember her heading to work in her nurse whites. Seeing her old nursing school cape takes me way back...she probably doesn’t know that I used to sneak it out of her closet and wear it a little bit. I admired her. I knew that she wasn't perfect, and never was; I never really held that childlike belief. I knew her as a person.
I'm biased, I have the most beautiful mother.
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| My favorite photo of my mom. <3 |
From my mother, I learned many things. I did not understand that women had a certain role in the workplace that was different than that of men. My mother worked alongside both men and women; she was respected and did well for herself. Her hobbies included several non-traditional things too. She had hotrods! She liked to fish, hunt and camp. I learned to love many of these same things, even if I do not actively pursue them at this juncture of my life.
I have to admit that my grandmother played a large part in this too, as an influence on my mother. Gram was also a nurse, a hunter, fisher, camper. Also very independent, she was the rebellious, beautiful daughter of Prohibitionist Great-Gram. Gram was glamorous and I was always amazed to see photos of her as a younger lady. I'll try get one from Mom and post it here.
Mom was also my first beauty role model. She isn't tall, leggy or scrawny like today's version of beauty. She's short-ish (thanks for the height Dad!), she's curvy but shapely. She has a fast smile and an easy laugh. She always looked great, even if she was wearing hunting clothes and no makeup. Again, she was my first fashion idol: independent, free, fun, comfortable, healthy, beautiful naturally.
As I grew older, I saw what "society" considered beautiful. I saw photos of Farrah Fawcett (RIP), I watched Linda Carter in Wonder Woman; I found them likewise beautiful. I never thought Twiggy was...attractive. Now, I'm not condemning what others consider beautiful, this was just from my young teen perspective. I was always a little odd; I started wearing black lipstick and dying my hair. My mother always stood beside me, chastising others for judging me based upon appearance without knowing me. My own HS principal called her once..."your daughter is a....a....a...Goth". My mom's response? "So? She's a good student, a lettered athlete. Why does this matter?" I will, mind you, always applaud her pluck when it came to defending me. I felt I was beautiful too.
I don't Mom knows how much I have always idolized her. I waxed eloquent on the subject after returning home after Christmas dinner; I doubt I can, or have, recaptured that feeling here. I've always loved and respected her as a child should, but I also love and admire her so greatly as an adult. She's everything I aspire to be. Beautiful, inside and out. Fiercely intelligent. A great friend. Oh, and she doesn't take anyone's shit.
I hope this apple didn't fall far from the tree....
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